Being dad...

I'm telling on you!

2012-01-29T19:07:00.004Z

I have been waiting for this phrase to rear it's ugly head as the sibling dynamics in my house evolve as each day goes on within our family life. Please do not get me wrong, Lucy and Anna adore each other, but they do like a good scrap and fight like cats and dogs at times. This usually happens after a bit of rough and tumble and one of them gets hurt by a whack in the face. This happened today and Lucy ran into the kitchen uttering those cursed words 'I'm telling on you!'. Anna ran in shortly after, uttering the same words, having very quickly picked up on the phrase used by her big sister.

Living with all these women, I do feel that my role will regularly take the guise of peacemaker and referee of arguments. Any day now the door slamming will begin, I already have much experience of the 'it's not fair' tactic. Fear not, I am a skilled listener and negotiator of female arguments ...

Caught in the act!

2012-01-22T21:13:00.008Z

Anna and I have both been caught in the act this weekend and there is potential blackmail and photographic evidence to prove it - neither of us have a defense at all. I am pictured undertaking my proactive approach to parenting at lunchtime today and I simply have no argument to put up.

One of Anna's favourite phrases this weekend has been 'I am only borrowing it'. She has swiped one of her sister's toys and things from the house to add to the hoard she keeps in her Toy Story rucksack as well as two crisp five pound notes from her mummy's purse which I found this morning in her things! She feels she has the freedom of everything in the house at present and it is proving very difficult to teach her boundaries and understanding about respect for other peoples' belongings. Here she is pictured having 'borrowed' her sisters prize possession - her DS. What can I say, she was born with much curiosity! The flip side is her wonderful generosity in sharing all that she has with anybody...

Things that make me shudder....

2012-01-15T20:49:00.011Z

Parents have a duty to overcome any concern that they have for themselves or things they do not like to support their children, bring them on and educate and protect. I have to say that I just don't do teeth and Lucy knows this and exploits it every day. I shudder when she wobbles her loose tooth; the more I ask her to stop, the more she delights in continuing! There are several more loose ones on the way that will cost me an arm and a leg from the mythical tooth fairy that is my endless pocket and continue to give me the creeps.

Great weekend - (started badly very early on Saturday morning as Anna and Lucy had a massive row in their room waking us up) - then peace was made - family time and good food. A walk in the crisp winter air at Sandringham, Pizza express, chill out time by the fire and finished off by roast beef next door today. Very convinced now that the Disney channel contains subliminal messages as Anna repeated to Amy when choosing a film to watch 'it's even better in HD on the Disney cinemagic!' A bit worried my kids watch too much TV?

All hail the magic trousers!

2012-01-07T18:52:00.004Z

Anna has bravely entered the world of going to bed without nappy again and she is a super star. Pleasingly, about ten days ago, she decided that it was time to try again and insisted she give it a go. Armed with her will, fighting British spirit and what we have told her are magic PJ trousers she has been dry for most of the last ten days. She is entering a new phase in her life of more independence and control and I am so proud of her that she took the bull by the horns and decided to give it a go again and is doing so well. Left to Amy and I am sure we would have delayed it till at least 2013 as we are quite simply knackered and did not relish the thought of getting up in the middle of the night. Keep going Anna - I still think the trousers are the contributing factor!

Year by year.....

2012-01-01T20:27:00.009Z

Another year as a parent has flown by and it has been full of truly rich experiences, amazing times, stressful, tiring and hard work, a steep learning curve, hilarious moments, touching and amazing moments but I would only ever describe it as fantastic.

It has been a hard year as well, as I have spent less time with Amy and the girls because of my new job and I have found that really tough indeed. I know it brings them lovely things, provides more stability and I am doing the right thing for my family, but days away from them all sometimes does not make sense. Sometimes I just feel I can't get that time back and I wonder whether it is worth it, but I quickly change my mind when Lucy tells me a very bad joke on the phone and tells me about her day or the welcome back Anna gives me when I get home and she won't let go of me in the tightest cuddle known to man. The girls are growing up so fast and I just don't want to miss a bit of it. I was listening to the radio in the car the other day to a programme about the armed forces serving in Afghanistan and the parents spending months away from their kids and in some cases missing their births and then I pull myself together, get on with it and remember how lucky I am. I am sorry I am not always there girls but I work so hard for you, you may not realise but but I want you to be proud of your dad and what he does and have everything you need.

Best moments this year - too many to mention. If I had to pick a few in a pressure moment I would probably go for den making in Sheringham Park, Wiggle and her goggles, everything that Lucy has done at school and how proud I am, Anna's birthday 'bridgewater' day out, the evolution of Lucy's drawings - I love the anticipation of what the next picture will bring, October ice cream weekend and the memorable 'Prats of the cranbeen'!

Thank you girls for all the joy you give me. You light up my life with every moment as your dad. Happy new year!

Festive fun, great food and a very special day...

2011-12-25T19:26:00.011Z

Santa did not disappoint today. Every member of the Hammond family has quite simply received some amazing gifts and we have all excelled ourselves in the Christmas shopping stakes. We are all chuffed to bits and now firmly flopped on the couch, unable to move having consumed way too much food (cooked by the delectable Mrs H) and in need of a sleep. Anna now has every Buzz Lightyear product known to man having had multiple Toy Story gifts: Buzz PJs, Buzz shopping trolley, Buzz watch, a big Woody, Buzz chocolates, Buzz cards and the limited edition Buzz dressing gown with built in flashing lights! She is in heaven. Lucy has the world's largest toy Dalmatian, some Zoobles, books, DS games, a new scooter and DVDs. She has a beaming grin and is so pleased with her hoard. Both the girls have had a fantastic day and I am really proud to have heard so many 'thank yous' and 'pleases'.

I feel very lucky that we have had a good year and can spoil the girls rotten - which we have! Highlights of the day: grandpa fixing a poorly Zooble; Libby's face when she opened her VW money box; silly glasses; whoopee cushion mayhem and the love and generosity that we have all shared today as a family complete with Granny and Grandpa...

One more sleep to go!

2011-12-24T13:59:00.005Z

Excitement is hitting high levels in the Hammond house as there is only one more sleep to go and then Santa comes down our chimney! The presents are wrapped and there is a serious amount of them under the tree. The girls are noisy and hyper excited - not necessarily what we want, but we are just having to go with it as there is no sign of them calming down and chilling out. Mince pies made, all goodies purchased for consumption, the house looks beautiful and festive and there is a real possibility that this year is the year I have excelled myself in the purchase of presents for Mrs Hammond and lots of them! All essential ingredients for a lovely family Christmas. The best thing of all, is that this is the first Christmas Eve that I have not worked since either of the girls were born and I am spending it with my family. Really looking forward to the Christingle service this afternoon.....

A star is born!

2011-12-16T20:33:00.003Z

Anna made her stage debut this week and a star was literally born. Playing the role of the star in the nursery nativity play, she found herself with a severe attack of shyness and spent most of the time with her thumb in her mouth and very subdued. Amy went to see the play and Anna has proudly told me about her starring role. Amy said she was quite simply adorable. She has been very cloak and dagger about the whole thing pre the performance, telling us all week that it is a secret - thinking that we do not know the story of the birth of Christ and all will only be revealed at her play! A kind of world premier that only she knows about. She has accidentally given away some of the content with some adorable renditions of several Christmas songs that she has learnt. Most memorably on Sunday singing with her cousins and her sister by killing 'Away in a Manger'. Such a new experience for her and the first time she has done something in front of so many people. normally gregarious and gobby, she moved into new territory and showed a really vulnerable side...

A cheeky version of the nativity!

2011-12-09T19:06:00.004Z

Went see Lucy's Christmas play today, it was delightful. I was so proud of Lucy for two reasons - firstly she had clearly worked hard and knew all the words of the songs and secondly she managed to overcome a really bad attack of the nerves. Lucy was a narrator telling the story with several others. When she came out she looked so worried and this was not helped by what happened next. Her first lines were delivered in front of about one hundred people and she clearly wobbled, but as she turned around to step off the reading box most people in the room saw her exposed bottom as her trousers were coming down! I did not know what to do with myself and I am so deeply ashamed that I burst into laughter. There were then tears and more worry from all concerned. I am not very proud of myself, but what she did next made me so proud of her. She lifted herself, got over it and then delivered her next two sets of lines to perfection and really enjoyed herself. Once we talked about it in the evening she managed to see the funny side as we told her she had the best bottom in Fakenham! Lucy, I know that you really do not enjoy being in the limelight, but you did great.

Opening up secret worlds..

2011-12-08T20:26:00.003Z

I have been on leave this week and it has really opened up my view of the world that my two children inhabit and what they enjoy. There are elements of their lives that Amy has seen so much of that I do not normally get to see when I am at work. My first lesson is how much they both enjoy spending time with us on their own as well as a family. Lucy is pictured here on a recent girlie shopping day with her mother, that she regularly refers back to with a glint in her eye. Having shared Wednesday with Anna and Amy, whilst Lucy was at school, it was a pleasure to see how much Anna enjoys being top dog without her big sister around and the benefit she is getting of that time alone with Amy. Having picked up Lucy from her rainbow's meeting and her dance class today, it was lovely to see the freedom she got from both of them. They were her experiences and she embraced them as her own and they are clearly is very important to her. I saw the girls swimming at their class last Saturday for the first time and was so proud of how well they were doing. Both were desperate to show me what they could do and probably underperformed as they tried to impress me. I think my presence was a little distracting! They have such a strong bond as sisters, but I have definitely learnt they are individuals who have things that are special to them and this week has opened my eyes a little...

Poorly Grandma...

2011-12-04T18:38:00.004Z

Grandma is poorly and back in for her biannual visit to hospital on the exact same day of the year. That's another story about fate and strange coincidences. It even extended to her being in the same bay at A & E. I am keeping my fingers crossed that she will make a full recovery. She has had a suspected stroke. Anyway, that was not really the reason I chose to blog about my pretty awful weekend. The reaction of the girls to how low I am feeling and their grandma being unwell has been amazing. Lucy's instant reaction was to draw and write a get well card, even though she never actually got round to it and to tell me that she would say a prayer for Grandma in church. Anna has been ringing her on her toy phone and telling me that she is going to be right. They have realised I am not feeling right and have been good as gold, giving me so many hugs and kisses and have looked after me. Amy has been amazing today and reminded me why I chose to spend the rest of my life with her. Thank you girls, just what I needed to boost my spirits and to feel positive again....

The day with swords, kung foo and a new director of purchasing!

2011-11-27T19:43:00.007Z

It has been quite an eventful and enjoyable day. I have had so much rough and tumble with the girls. We have played knights and fire breathing tickling dragons, superheros, kung foo panda fighting and connect four by the fire. Anna has been bonkers and at her giggling best, running around the yard as 'super wiggle' was a real highlight of my family day. Amy has a new self declared title in our house: she is the newly appointed 'Director of purchasing' in the Hammond house, Lucy is now the 'Director of bossy boots' and Anna - the 'Director of Wiggle! I tell you I get a new job title based on hard work, dedication and commitment and the women in my life want a title in one day based on female envy! I must say though - they all do fulfill their roles with gusto and skill!

The one with the red hat and the kind girl.....

2011-11-21T21:07:00.002Z

Lucy is going from strength to strength at school. Amy would be able to give you accurate descriptions of levels in her capacity as a teacher, but every conversation we have is talking about Lucy going up a specific level in her reading. I cannot put into context whether this is impressive or how well she is actually doing. All I know (without teacher speak) is that I am really proud of her and I think she is working really hard and is focused. Most of all, she clearly loves to learn and impress through it too. I was delighted to hear that she was nominated as a 'red hat' at school due to her kind nature. This is a pupil who helps others in the play ground in case they fall over or need help. Her certificate is proudly displayed in the kitchen following her two week stint within this role. Another role she has landed is as narrator in the school nativity play - can't wait! Although Lucy is very nervous and anxious, I know she will do well as long as she does not pick her nose like last year or the wind does not whistle through the gaps in her teeth as she narrates the greatest story on earth.......Watch this space!

The smile of a girl who loves more time with her mummy..

2011-11-16T20:40:00.003Z

Anna is having a cracking time, with Amy now working part time they are spending so much more time together and she is blooming and flourishing. It is one of the real benefits of my new job and is a sheer joy to watch. She is becoming a grown up little package and I can see the bond between them growing and becoming very special. I feel so pleased that I have been a part of making that happen. At tea tonight I simply watched Anna as she hung on Amy's every word with adoring eyes and told me about their day together - feeding the ducks and the horses, a cup of tea with friends and cycling with Lucy to school. She was articulate and as she often does, spoke with her eyes and love of the simple things in life. I have loved coming home this week and Anna telling me about her day. her pride in being a rising five at nursery and the sense of being 'grown up' she gets from it is lovely to hear about. Enjoy the time with Mummy Wiggle - life can go by so quickly and this time next year you will be at school....

Password Wobbly!

2011-11-12T20:15:00.004Z

Lucy's latest wobbly tooth came out today, the envelope and notes (which now includes the extra special and secret password formulated today - 'wobbly') are under her pillow and now asleep she has gone to bed with the expectation of cash and lots of it. Earlier, she was discussing that she felt the tooth fairy should hand over at least one hundred pounds. Not a chance Lucy, but once again good try! Your mother and I need to actually remember our part of the bargain and put the money under your pillow tonight, would be useful?!? I appreciate more the time I have with the girls as I went four days without seeing them all this week and had a cracking hour clearing leaves, feeding pretend dragons and playing football with Wiggle today. As Amy and Lucy went out today, I was so chuffed that she elected to stay with me as both the girls normally choose Mummy. Big smile!

Den making, roast pork and whizzing around on bikes!

2011-11-06T19:15:00.005Z

Great day today. Bistro, hot chocolate - most of which was spilt on my trousers, split my trousers in the bottom much to the delight of the girls and then off to Sheringham park with the bikes. Picnic in the car, as was slightly cold. Anna hurtled down a hill at such a speed she went over the handle bars and had the time of her life. We then found a clearing in the woods where the owners leave drift wood, stones, rocks and planks for making your own sculpture and dens - it was such fun.The family Hammond actually worked together as a team and did not fight once whilst making our super, deluxe den. Then home for a delicious roast dinner and fire side telly. That will do me nicely before I start a long week's work away from home...

Dr Who?

2011-11-05T19:25:00.006Z

We have allowed the girls to watch Dr Who on the odd occasion after checking that all is well and it is not too scary. I remember spending many an evening hiding behind the couch when I was a boy petrified of Davros, leader of the Daleks. The girls love it, but I believe they may have misheard the actual name of one of the main villains. Armed with washing baskets on their heads, they wandered around the house pretending to be Daleks. Slight problem. They decided that the menacing speech that came with their impression of television's most darkest villains was 'I am a Garlic!' Does not quite have the same impact - made me giggle not shudder. Good impression of the robotic voices though....

A really scary bunch!

2011-10-31T21:32:00.005Z

The women in in my life are a formidable and scary bunch and I am really not sure that I need the festival of Halloween to remind me of that fact! They are stubborn, opinionated, strong minded, self sufficient, high maintenance and no amount of scary masks can make me any more overrun or frightened than I already am. They may be all of this, but I love them with all my heart. There are days when I could run a mile and search out male company to talk about football and manly things and other days when being with them feels like nothing I have ever experienced in my life before and is simply amazing. Not a good weekend in the run up to the festival of fear today as I lost every battle at the weekend and was quite simply overrun by three strong women. Family life will always have its ups and its downs and being a dad and a husband is very scary at times, however I would not miss it for the world and it makes me a better person each day. So keep scaring me girls and I will always come back for more....

Moments to treasure...

2011-10-27T20:52:00.004+01:00

I have had some lovely moments with the girls this week and several that have made me want to scream. For the purpose of today's blog I am going to stick with the positive. Last Sunday - the day finished with a fire side game of 'Scaredy cat' - just the three of us while Amy read her book and we chatted and chilled out. Simple time together. Really enjoyed it. Silly singing in the car to the 'Lightening Seeds' and 'Scouting for Girls' - Anna wiggling and jiggling and Lucy singing like a drowned cat. Today, we had squirty cream moustaches, reading signs in the town with Lucy and the lady in a clothes shop that I though was Anna I called 'darling'. Saving the best for last was Anna's monologue about when she was born she did not like ears, cheese, shirts, hats, mayonnaise, ketchup, scarves, glasses... the list went randomly on and she milked her audience with her bizarre and wacky conversation, giggling all the way through it. Anna you worry me and yet entertain me every day I spend with you.

Birthday week has been and gone...

2011-10-21T20:41:00.005+01:00

I did not see much of the birthday girls at all this week. I think Amy and Lucy had good days but I didn't have much time with them to qualify that. Disappointingly, I did not get home in time to see Lucy open her presents on Monday evening although she did open her big present in the morning before I left for work and that drew me to tears. Based on that reaction, good job I was not around in the evening otherwise I would have been a mess! I felt very emotional about my little girl being six and growing up so fast. Amy had a chill out shopping day on her birthday and then fell asleep on the couch after a Thai feast, so did not really see her either! I was useless with her present and took the easy way out of giving her some money to go and do what she does best - spend! With work taking up more of my time at the moment. I really do miss all three of my girls. This family, as you can see, is lacking my presence and things are not quite right.....

Six of the best!

2011-10-16T19:45:00.005+01:00

Tomorrow my baby girl is going to be six! I have decided to dig out my favourite photo so far of my Looby Chick and I fondly remember the pride I had in her that prompted me to start this blog several years ago and record our family life. She hasn't changed a scrap, maybe slightly less teeth. Now she is all grown up, complete with attitude and an answer for everything. On Friday evening I picked her up from her first school disco and she was so keen to show me how grown up she was. She was out after dark and bopping the night away and was really keen for me to meet all her friends. Today, we have celebrated her birthday as we will all be at school and work respectively in the morning. At Lucy's request we dined out for lunch with some of her very noisy pals and then all back to our house to trash it, make cakes and sneak in a few presents. Lucy was delightful as she was quick to tell her friends that they must include and help her little sister. All I can ask is Lucy - don't grow up too fast, I am enjoying being your dad way too much for it to go quickly. Enjoy your birthday tomorrow, I am truly sorry I can't be with you, but I have loved today even though you and all your friends communicate with each other at one volume. VERY LOUD!

Jumpers on, fire lit and batton down the hatches - it's autumn!

2011-10-08T18:39:00.003+01:00

The family Hammond is cold, very cold indeed. We are hibernating and have gone into winter mode. Camped around the first fire of the year watching 'Disney Cinemagic', snug in Pyjamas, the realisation that autumn is here has finally kicked in. With several family birthdays on the horizon the female Hammond's have begun their present attack and the wish lists are coming in thick and fast. I can feel my wallet being raided in the next week or so. I do tell a lie, Mrs Hammond is strangely quiet on the present front apart from the usual bombardment of can I have an Audi, Passat or a mansion in the country. That is day to day stuff and I simply do not pay attention. Lucy, on the other hand is highly organised and has submitted a detailed wish list for her birthday and Christmas for the next five years. It is incredulous that she will be six in a week or so. She has been a superstar at school and at home with her reading so a big birthday surprise is needed. The big question is what to buy Mrs Hammond, what indeed......

October ice cream fest!

2011-10-02T21:22:00.004+01:00

It has been really difficult to blog in recent weeks, let alone see Amy and the girls, but this weekend has been a delightful oasis of unexpected sunshine and record temperatures completed by a lovely weekend with my family. It has been so hot we have eaten more ice cream (as demonstrated by Anna) in two days than we did for the whole summer! We have had sorbet, ice lollies, Cornish, Hagendass, wafers, squirty cream, chocolate sauce and last but definitely not least Oyster Wafers with marsh mellow and ice cream in them (oh yes and sprinkles!) Ummm. Managing dehydration as a family is important in hot weather you know..

Blond and bonkers!

2011-09-24T21:04:00.008+01:00

Anna continues to grow up at such a rate that there are times when I cannot keep up. Having been away again this week I have come back and it feels like I have missed out on weeks of time with her. She is more carefree, mischievous, expressive and bonkers than ever. Outside the bistro this morning she danced to a saxophonist playing the theme tune to the Pink Panther in her own uninhibited style. People walked by and she barley noticed. Her style was to say 'unique'. Kind of a combination of kung foo fighting, ballet and a comic seizure. She was in her own world and she simply did not care. In know it's a cliche, but she is truly a free spirit. She has hit high levels of excitement as we have made the promise of a trip to the dinosaur park tomorrow. Probably her favourite place in her world. Tonight, as I settled her down in bed she told me with a big giggle that she was going to tickle and slap the big dinosaur in the morning! Insisting she wore her newly purchased Buzz Lightyear slippers in bed, she tucked her Toy Story wallet under her pillow along with the biscuits she stole a few minutes previous, put her thumb in her mouth and simply smiled at me with her eyes. You have no choice but to love her and all her eccentricities, she has a wonderful ability of just sucking you in....Best Anna comment of the weekend - 'Thank you for mummy's boobies'. Really not sure what inspired that comment! Anna you are so right. There is not a day that does not go by when I do not give thanks for Amy's boobies.

The floodgates open up and more teeth flee their owner!

2011-09-17T19:15:00.004+01:00

Lucy did not initially open up at all about how she was getting on at school this term and now she will not stop talking about it and has suddenly chosen to divulge everything without prejudice. I will never understand the fairer sex, they go from one extreme to another! She has brought some great work and drawings home this week that have been a delight to see. She has told me about her new teacher whom she states is always ill, a new friend she has made, learning about Egyptian gods and how being in year one is still all about play and learning. 'It is important to play and learn Daddy, just learning would be boring and not fair!', she stated with a very serious and determined face. Lots of talk about the tooth fairy again today and the handing over of more cash as Anna relieved her of another tooth with an accidental whack in the mouth! Looks like another may come out overnight as well. Expensive weekend. Anna speculatively put a note under her pillow tonight as well, better oblige with some cash for her as well based on general levels of cuteness...

The one with more wobbly teeth, a code of silence and funny face soup!

2011-09-10T14:51:00.006+01:00

Another busy week has rolled by and I have returned home to find out that much has changed. Lucy has got three more wobbly teeth (could be an expensive weekend!) and is trying to pull them out for capital gain encouraged by her materialistic mother. She went back to school and had her first days in year one this week and at present flat out refuses to answer a single question about how she is getting on and simply shrugs her shoulders with a 'huh'. We are all tired and in need of a chill out. Amy is asleep and the girls and I are trashing the living room, armed with a tub of junk, glue and much glitter. Great fun and I am not even neurotic about the mess! Just great to be around my family after time away. At lunch today I initiated funny face soup. You have some and then pull a face. Got them to eat their lunch though, alright probably not the best example of good manners, but I needed to be silly with my girls. Well done Wiggle - more dry nights and a real determination to succeed. The family Hammond has hit high levels of excitement today with the impending onset of Strictly Come dancing tonight. Keeeeep dancing! Strictly did not disappoint as the girls got into their fairy outfits and danced the night away. Good to be back...

It's fun being Wiggle!

2011-09-04T16:54:00.005+01:00

Anna enjoys life at a real pace. Always on the go and up to something, she quietly goes about creating havoc and mayhem whilst usually naked! In the last few days she has been up to much. Whizzing around on her bike, yesterday she helped me make a sand birthday cake with shells on wells beach, messily eating ice cream, making mud soup, embarrassing teenage boys with witty one liners, 'killing' naughty stinging nettles with a special stick and singing to Transvision Vamp in the car. I have said it many times - the girl is bonkers. If only I had a camera yesterday as she ran around on the beach naked as the day she was born wearing only goggles collecting shells. You have got to love her. She has also bravely taken on the challenge of no nappy at night and so far is having a decent stab at it. Dry nights: 3 Wet nights: 2. Well done Wiggle. So far that is a winning score! Sometimes it is easy to forget that she is only just three...

I am missing out, or so I thought....

2011-08-29T18:36:00.004+01:00

I got the job! WOW! Having achieved my promotion and previously discussed the sadness of the potential of not spending time with Amy and the girls. This has already kicked in over the bank holiday weekend as I have frantically tried to wind down one job role and wind up another. I am, however extremely positive now about the opportunities this will bring for my family and feel very proud of what I have achieved. I really hope that in the future this will show my girls what hard work, dedication and commitment can bring you in life and that we all need to contribute to society and that is the only way to lead your life. Work hard and be a good person. I hope they will be proud of me and what I have achieved so far and in the future. This weekend the family Hammond went camping and I have made fleeting visits to the camp site in between nipping home and doing some work. I had a magical hour in the tent just chilling and chatting with Anna yesterday and a really nice time chatting away with Lucy in the early hours of Sunday morning after she ended up sleeping in our bed for the first time ever in her five years so far. Not that pleased that when she was asleep she ground her teeth. She then had the nerve to wake me up and tell me off for snoring having kept me awake for hours! I guess if I want to succeed and do really well in my new role as a member of senior management I will have to learn to really make the most of the time I have with my family and enjoy those little moments. The girls have crashed now and are fast asleep after all that fresh sea air and the adventure of camping. Quick note: Lucy - just checked on you and you were snoring!

A potential new opportunity brings sadness...

2011-08-22T21:05:00.013+01:00

It has been a stupidly busy week or so since I went back to work and my time with Amy and the girls has been sparse at best. Four days elapsed last week and I did not see Wiggle as she was either away camping or asleep when I got home. Lucy wrote me a lovely note on the magic board telling how much she missed me when I came back from some time away. I have been very thoughtful about this as I have applied for a promotion and will know the outcome by Thursday this week. Whilst it will bring much opportunity for my family, the time I spend with them may well reduce and that simply makes me very sad indeed. What is the role of a father if it does not mean providing for your family and making that kind of sacrifice? However, as the day of the interview draws closer, it is the one thing that niggles in the back of mind and concerns me. The job carries a great deal of responsibility and to get this promotion would make me very proud. However, it has a sting in its tail and if successful, I am afraid that I am just going to have to learn to deal with it and fast as I will hit the ground running within the new role in about a week. Watch this space...

Time's up and I feel quite down in the dumps...

2011-08-14T21:39:00.010+01:00

My holiday is now officially over and as tiring, bonkers, busy and stubborn as my girls are (that includes Amy!), I feel really low that my two weeks with them has come to an end and I must return to the daily grind of work. I love my work very much, but it will never compare to time with my family and the love I feel for them. We haven't done anything spectacular, but simply spent time together. Amy and the girls are going camping tomorrow and I will not see them for a few days and I can already feel that sinking feeling in my stomach that I am not spending time with them. I will have plenty to keep me busy with work though! Thanks for a lovely break girls and I will see you in October half term. This is me being sarcastic, but if things go according to plan in the next week or so, I am going to become even busier at work and that statement may not be too far from the truth! My holiday blogging does finish with a great quote from last night as the girls innocently sang 'Daddy is a slapper! Daddy is a slapper!' This stemmed from a conversation with our neighbour Libby about misspent youth that the girls were not supposed to hear. Shame on you Libby, I have relied on you as moral guidance for my children and you have severely mislead them about their father! Thank heavens we managed to push the conversation towards the fact that I am an excellent slapper of wasps with a newspaper, not any other context! Intelligent, creative and skilled parental deflection was put into play to great success...

Girls with attitude!

2011-08-12T17:42:00.008+01:00

The end of my holiday is coming up and my time with my family is going to be limited when I go back to work next week. I have really loved the slow pace and time with the girls, however there has been one negative that I am starting to fight back against today - my girls can sometimes overdo it and can be right little madams! They are really strong characters and always trying to impose themselves upon making choices and being part of decision making and this is something I will always encourage. But in recent weeks the way they have gone about this has been misguided and they are forgetting their manners and have quite frankly been a bit out of order. They both have treasured possessions in 'Jack the baby' and 'Oddball' and as from today if they are rude three times these 'loved' ones are removed and returned after a designated period of time. This has not gone down too well but is having the desired affect! That's step one. Step two is too ensure that I continue to follow this through. As you can see they are not amused, but manners are so important and I need to get on top of this as their father and ensure they do not slip again. Easier said than done with my two!

Families can be expensive...

2011-08-08T19:29:00.006+01:00

Especially mine! The three women in my life hunt as a materialistic pack and their leader is cunning, skilled and makes a very formidable adversary when it comes to spending money and generating further ideas on future purchases. This leader is my wife, she may be beautiful, but underestimate her at your peril and her apprentices are quite skilled too. Today we have been shopping for clothes for the Mrs and Lucy's school clothes and I feel like I really am missing an arm and a leg. There is a need for a new tent as ours is really not up to much and the birthday present orders are already coming in for October (the most expensive week of the year). Actually I am quite surprised they usually start coming in about May or June, the girls must be loosing their touch a tad! Lucy is upping the anti this year as she has asked for a Nintendo DS. I think she is ready for her first computer game and would love it, but god have you seen the price of those things and the games? How am I going to survive a lifetime financial commitment to the these highly skilled women without having a nervous breakdown? Only time will tell whether I have the resistance and the stomach for the fight. At the moment I am just about holding my own...

Hot sun, jumping girls and damn tired parents!

2011-08-04T19:40:00.008+01:00

The weather has been scorching (apart from today when it has been lashing it down for hours), the girls are full of life and having a really busy and fun holiday (swimming, bike rides, playing games in the garden, ice creams in wells, going to the park and much more) and Amy and I are quite simply knackered! So tomorrow, the girls are heading to holiday club to make 'bug houses' for the day and Amy and I are going out to have some adult time, a spot of lunch and some chill out. If we don't head out and force ourselves we would climb into bed and sleep for the day! The girls have been enjoying the freedom of going to bed late and being more grown up which has been lovely but the time Amy and I have had together has been limited in the last couple of weeks. So bring on the sunshine tomorrow and quiet time with my wife....

At least know that I can care for sunflowers!

2011-08-01T21:23:00.005+01:00

The family competition to grow the tallest and best sunflower is hotting up and strangely they are growing in exact height order within the family, and this also includes this years guest competitors our neighbours Libby and Ben. Ben racing into a commanding lead and Wiggle bravely bringing up the rear. All are healthy and growing nicely. It's my birthday tomorrow and I have been reflecting on the parental and non parental events, achievements and disasters of my thirty-sixth year on planet earth today. Family wise it has not been a good day for me as I find myself very tired and very cross in the world of living with three strong women. I always find the beginning of my holiday hard as my body and brain try to slow down from a very busy and demanding job. I always feel several steps behind Amy and the girls in winding down and it is difficult. I have to say on today's efforts I should stick to gardening! My two favourite reflections on this year are not profound or really anything to do with the parental struggle or a reflection on my skills, but I feel they need revealing. I really do like Emma Bridgewater china and I am developing a pathological hatred for the colour pink! Work those out and come out with an analytical conclusion in connection with parenting....

Cycling whizz kids!

2011-07-27T20:42:00.006+01:00

Wiggle has achieved another remarkable feat this week, just three weeks after her third birthday she is bombing around on her bike with the stabilisers off! There have been many falls, but she is already very proficient and very proud of what she has achieved. This is the point where I simply type that I have a beaming smile on my face and that describes how I feel about this latest achievement by my youngest daughter. There has been much celebration within the Hammond house and everybody is delighted. Not to be undone, Lucy has spent the week developing her one handed cycling technique to make sure she gets a parental look in and she too has nearly mastered this. Very cool girls, very cool indeed....

School's out for Summer!

2011-07-23T16:44:00.003+01:00

There is a slight problem with the above statement, somebody forgot to order the summer and the weather is not that great for July! The paddling pool has not graced our garden for weeks now as we battle the cold, the wind and intermittent very heavy rain. It's the first day of the school holidays today and as well as the absence of sunshine I forgot to order happy children as well. Lucy has her grumpy, I know it all face on today, Amy is so tired that she has gone for a nap and Anna also forgot to wake up with her sense of humour too. Oh happy days for the male fraternity in the Hammond house..

What a difference a day makes....

2011-07-17T18:54:00.004+01:00

Twenty four little hours. Uplifted by the amount of drugs and ice packs I have applied to my back and feeling more like a human being as each hour goes by; I suggested that the family Hammond hit the coast and headed for sunny Cromer and it did not disappoint. We had fish and chips, ice cream, went on the fun fair rides and had a damn good time. We even escaped the weather, driving home in a thunder storm as earlier the girls had been playing on the beach in glorious sunshine. We have a picture in our house that I have always loved of two girls playing on the sand. Very simple, yet very effective and it captures the innocence and delight of childhood. I had my own picture to admire today as I sat on the pebbles watching Amy and the girls play in the sea and in the rocks pools. It was lovely to watch. Such a shame I did not take the camera and capture the moment for ever. I'll keep that one just for me in my head. Anna of course had to be naked as she legged it around, grabbing seaweed as Lucy searched for pebbles. Good end to a much better day and the drugs have not even worn off yet!

Roll on the summer holidays! (and fast)

2011-07-16T16:45:00.005+01:00

I am frustrated to say the least today. Having worked extremely hard in the last few weeks I was really looking forward to spending time with Amy and the girls. The weather is appalling and it is chucking it down and Wiggle is the only one of us who is in good form. Might be something to do with the fact that she slept for thirteen hours last night. Great work if you can get it! I have pulled a muscle in my back and can barely do anything. I am doped up on painkillers, applying ice every hour and walking around like a ninety year old man. Amy has a stinking cold coming and clearly is exhausted after a very long year teaching. Lucy is also very tired having nearly completed her first year of school and needs the summer holidays desperately. One more week to go and the girls will have a lovely and well deserved six weeks off. Two more weeks and I will join them for my annual two week break in early August. Oh heaven. Heaven indeed. N.B. Lucy's third wobbly tooth came out yesterday and I have to say mine and Amy's track record about ensuring the myth of the tooth fairy stays alive in our house is pretty poor as we forgot again last night to swap the tooth for money. Only some quick thinking this morning saved us and we just about got away with it...

Party girl..

2011-07-10T19:02:00.003+01:00

Now that Lucy is at school her circle of friends has widened. Which means lots of friends, lots of birthday parties. Lucy loves this. The bouncy castles, trips to mega fun, brightly coloured party drinks, party bags, new toys, large bits of cake and complete freedom and licence to run around like a headless chicken for a couple of hours. Her parents on the other hand are not quite as enamoured. We have had loads of parties in recent months and I have to say all the endless presents that we need to buy for children we don't always know is my first annoyance. All these children have cost me about £120 in recent months! Secondly, is the parties that Lucy is not quite so sure about being there on her own for. When you sit there like a lemon, the only bloke in the room as all the mums talk about mum things leaving you extremely socially isolated and bored out of your skull. Lastly is the noise level. Oh my god! The last thing you want on a Sunday afternoon is twenty five very loud five year olds. I would prefer garden, coffee and quiet before the new working week begins. Today, Lucy has yet another party and this time we dropped her off and spent time in the garden. I appreciated the whole experience more as I enjoyed listening to her tales of the excitement of the party and what a good time she had had. My kind of party - one at a distance...

Reporting good things...

2011-07-04T19:44:00.005+01:00

The long and anxious wait for Lucy's first ever school report came today and boy was it worth the wait! It was a cracker. Lucy is evaluated utilising a scoring system out of nine for each area of development and the maximum score is '117'. I am very proud to announce that Lucy scored '99', well above average. I am simply delighted and want to sing it from the rooftops of Fakenham. In fact I already have and have shared my delight on the world wide web of Facebook! Lucy is working very hard at school and we need to keep pushing her so that there will be many more years of such good school reports and hopefully a bright future for my eldest daughter. I went a bit over the top this evening and started talking to her about university. She just wanted to have a conversation about Tinkerbell and being a fairy princess. A mild attack of over enthusiastic dad came on. Sorry Lucy, probably a bit early to heap that level of pressure on such young shoulders. I will wait till you are six before I start talking about university again!

A little birthday Wiggle!

2011-07-02T18:48:00.009+01:00

Yesterday Anna turned the ripe old age of three and suddenly evolved into a lady of sophistication. She started the day (after delicately opening her presents) by taking a cappuccino in the bistro, then moved onto checking out the latest movie on mummy's mobile, then taking lunch in Wiveton at the poshest cafe in Norfolk, picking strawberries, visiting a farm house she wishes to rent, then back home for tea and cake in posh china cups and fish and chips with granny and grandpa! She is one classy three year old! She absolutely adored her scooter and marble run which are her main pressies. As excited as I was by the marble run, putting the damn thing together was less than enjoyable due to the low level of my practical skills. What should have taken ten minutes, took nearly an hour! Happy Birthday Wiggle! Her day was spent with friends and family she really loves and I think she had a cracking day. We love you with all our hearts.

Amazing! Simply amazing!

2011-06-25T19:42:00.005+01:00

Without any prompting, help or encouragement Anna did something that could quite possibly be one of the most amazing things I have ever seen. She picked up Lucy's writing training cards, grabbed a pen and began to trace over the words with exceptional accuracy and skill. She has never done this before, never been encouraged to write and never shown an interest. I am no educational or developmental expert when it comes to children but I believe for a child who is not yet three that is simply wonderful. I am quite literally speechless. She is still doing it downstairs and has been doing this for about fifteen minutes and each word she traces gets better and better. The giggle as each card is completed is a noise I have never heard from Anna that conveys sheer excitement and love of life and I have to confess that the last fifteen parental minutes have been some of the most wondrous I have had so far. A tear is streaming down my cheek. Sheer emotion and pride. WOW! I know that Wiggle is bright but now I am worried! Not so much for Amy as Lucy has been putting her hair into a pony tail and there are lots of ow, oh and ah's coming from her mouth! Hairdressing may not be Lucy's chosen career....

Some days I do have worries....

2011-06-21T21:11:00.009+01:00

Fathers day always makes me in a very reflective mood. I promised myself that this year would be the year I would not do this and spend too much time reflecting on the past and my lack of a father in my childhood, but the past has caught up with me again and I have ended up with the same thoughts in my head. Firstly I realise how lucky I am and then I have the very quick and stark realisation that I must always keep going in my role as a dad and not make the same mistakes my parents did. I must always work hard to be a good dad, keep thinking, keep learning and show the two beautiful daughters that I have been gifted with how to grow up and lead their lives as good people.

Being a good parent is the most difficult, yet rewarding of tasks and it can at times be a heavy burden and there is not a day that does not go by when you do not worry about whether you are doing the right thing. The girls both enter new phases of their lives as they each grow up and develop that bring Amy and I new challenges as their parents and the lessons you learn in bringing up the eldest often mean nothing when going though the same stage with your youngest. I have never had to think and deliberate as much as I do as a father. All I know is; that the more I deliberate the closer I get to the answers or the further away I get from doing the right thing. Parenthood is all a bit confusing and the only way forward is to take one day at a time and tell yourself that no matter what you are in it for the long haul and will try and do your best. The rest is down to a bit of luck, maybe fate and the will of the gods.

In looking at the picture attached I feel a positive glow that despite all my rants, thoughts and agitations with being a parent, that maybe I am actually doing ok and that I worry too much. Lucy and Anna look happy and are deeply loved. So I will put away the self doubt until next year and see what lessons I have learnt and continue to grow in my role as a dad and try not to cloud my enjoyment of father's day by dwelling on the past.

Another father's day roles by....

2011-06-19T20:24:00.007+01:00

The girls rose very early today at 6am, however I was granted a delightful father's day lie in and stumbled out of my bed at 8am. This is a rarity and I did not want to get out of my warm pit. However, Anna had different ideas - she wanted to help mummy peel the vegetables for today's lunch and Amy had quite rightly declined her. Anna mounted one of her most audible strops in recent weeks and stomped up the stairs emotionally declaring her mother a 'liar' and 'not her friend anymore', and then the day begun. Excited by the arrival of Granny and Grandpa for a family meal, the girls levels of excitement and noise just grew and grew as the morning went on, as did my headache. Lucy was, for once far more bonkers than her sister. The noise levels finally dulled as the afternoon went on and with a full belly of Roast beef, apple cake and biscuits and cheese the grown ups settled down for some snoring (thank you, Granny), playing 'scaredy cat' and a chilled out afternoon. The rain has not helped in the last few days leaving the girls stuck indoors and needing to break free, however they were in good yet loud form today and I completed another father's day based on simplicity and family time. Thank you for my lovely cards and watch girls. Father's day still remains a new and slightly alien experience to me, but one I could really get used to....

A changing wind in my house...

2011-06-14T20:14:00.010+01:00

The girls have been superstars since the weekend. All seems forgiven at present and both girls have been of good humour, empathy for their father and so far we have a strop free zone this week. Having been struck down by a stomach bug since Sunday they have asked me how I am, tried to look after me, insisted I have peace and quiet and generally looked after their old man. Thank you girls. Not all of their empathy has filled me with joy though. Anna has continually told me of her experiences in being sick and Lucy has retold us several tales of her exploits of where she has been sick in the house and it's various colours. I know that they are only trying to be helpful, but sometimes?! On a similar subject Lucy very ably looked after 'Charlie Chimp' from school at the weekend and did a great bit of writing to take back to school on Monday. As you can see Charlie looked pretty happy being under the hospitality of the family Hammond. Lucy came home today beaming as she had to see the headteacher and take her excellent writing to show her. She even got a sticker! Anna is taking a strange tact in looking after her toys by shoving them in her rucksack overnight and letting them spend the night in there. Florence Nightingale she ain't. 'Lala the Teletubby' must have a really bad back today after a night in that cramped space! Please see picture attached as she takes 'baby Jack' for a bit of a cramped spin on her balance bike! I suppose it's all part of the learning process in looking after others. I am just glad that Anna did not shove me in her rucksack overnight....

There are some things with which a clear line should be drawn!

2011-06-09T18:41:00.004+01:00

I am a very proud dad. My girl is growing up. She is getting taller, her writing is coming on a treat and her second baby tooth came out today. Now I remember my agreement with Lucy and the tooth fairy and I poorly negotiated a price per tooth which I begrudgingly accept. I did not however sign up for what has happened today. I always said to Lucy that the tooth fairy needed to see Lucy's tooth before handing over the cash, quite reasonable I thought. I did not bargain on Lucy swallowing her tooth. There is no way on hells earth I am waiting for that to come out! I will simply be compliant and handover the cash! On this occasion I would even pay extra! Going back to Lucy's writing. She is making some really excellent attempts at words that should be way beyond her and trying to write sentences. Having spoken to the teaching guru that is my wife last night she says that this is very good. Today's attempt did not go quite so well. Lucy wrote the 'Pirates of the Caribbean', this came out as the 'Prats and the Cranbeen'. Priceless. Simply Priceless.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder then they hit you with it!

2011-06-05T19:23:00.006+01:00

Amy and the girls have had half term off together filled with a picnic at Sandringham (Anna choosing to be naked in the presence of the queen), a walk at Morston and a trip to see Kung Foo Panda at the cinema. I have been grafting and working and was away for some of this week too. The reception the girls gave me was wonderful - cuddles and kisses, at one point Anna would not let me go to the point that I could not breath! Very flattering and then they hit me with tantrums, sulking and a generally high level of being miserable. When I have not been here, I think the girls find it very difficult to adjust to me being back and tensions run over. I am desperate to spend time with them and they just want to continue as normal. Today has been fantastic though - a really fun family day. The girls helped me in the garden and Anna's game of shooting stick brought a big smile to my face. The sound affect that goes with the naked shooting was very amusing indeed. I have never known a human being who enjoys life so much when naked. I did tell her today that if she is not careful she might get a reputation in later life! Anyway - thanks for a good day today girls with minimal stropping too (bonus!)

Oh it's been a struggle this week...

2011-05-29T17:52:00.006+01:00

Last Sunday I told you that the girls desperately needed a break and that tempers have been fraying to say the least. How true that was as every day this week has been an uphill struggle complete with mass stropping, tired rudeness, both girls forgetting their manners and their general lack of any sense of humour. You could say that parenting has been a thankless task this week. Anna finished this off with the most almighty of strops as Amy dared to suggest that it was bed time the other night! (pictured left with slightly satanic eyes) Lucy has taken to evaluating everything I do and telling me that I am doing it wrong and neither will do a damn thing I ask them too. I am not a happy bunny. I do however understand they are worn out and will give them the grace of half term and a rest before I totally blow my top. I, on the other hand do not have the grace of half term and my family will just have to submit to my grumpiness!!

Fighting and magic...

2011-05-22T16:47:00.006+01:00

The girls have not stopped fighting, moaning and grumping all weekend. As we approach the end of this half term it is very evident that they really do need a break. However despite the full scale war that has erupted in my house this weekend there have been some truly magical moments that have shown me what a bond they also have with each other too. Lucy is very protective of her little sister and is also the only person in her eyes who can give Anna 'verbal' and a hard time too. Yesterday, they played together for almost an hour without barely a squeak. All they needed was a cushion, two books, some beads, a tea towel, their imagination and hey presto! You have a pirate ship and some treasure! Apart from that - we have had tiredness, tears, tantrums and a full on fight at 6am this morning. God knows what they will be like when they are teenagers, but thanks for the pirate ship memories. Anna's 'Ha, Ha me hearties' was memorable indeed! P.S. just sat in the deckchair in the yard and it collapsed. I was delighted as Lucy offered me the Mr Happy ice pack. No dignity...

Book worm...

2011-05-17T20:11:00.005+01:00

A really nice thing happened yesterday. Lucy read all of one of her school reading books with me. I was delighted and she did so well. Amy and I tend to have different roles in the girls lives and I have often spoke of how hard I find it to teach the girls academic things and support them in their learning. Lucy did a great job and I was just pleased that I held onto my fears long enough to talk her through it. It may not set the world alight in terms of a major event, but it meant a great deal to me and the hug we had afterwards finished off the experience. I keep mentioning it, but the small things can sometimes be the most memorable. Just as memorable is that Anna and I seem to have called a truce on our battle for the last few days too. Watch this space!?!

Music to my ears!

2011-05-11T20:35:00.000+01:00

I have had a mishap with my car; taking out the whole of my back bumper attempting to avoid running over the cat and having a very physical argument with the water pump at the back of the house. I have to say swear words were used and I feel a complete and utter Muppet. Thankfully the cat is OK! Lucy quite simply thinks the whole thing is hilarious and celebrated this with a song this morning. I came downstairs to Lucy pounding the pink piano in the hall way singing 'Daddy crashed the car! Daddy crashed the car!' Thank you Lucy for celebrating my misery and really raising my levels of self worth, self esteem and making me feel even more stupid that I actually am. My response is: duly noted and I will calmly wait for my revenge....

I am not your friend anymore Daddy!

2011-05-07T18:26:00.003+01:00

I had forgotten about the battle for independence than ensues with a nearly three year old and Anna has defiantly drawn the lines of battle. The most used phrase in our house this week has definitely been 'I am not your friend anymore Daddy'. The main battle has been simply getting her to go to bed and stay in the bloody thing! Amy and I have really struggled to even have one evening together, as our time is spent going up and down the stairs to stop her getting up to her latest mischief and get her to sleep. I have to confess to being a tad weary today as a result of this. It is all coming back to me in glorious technicolour in that Lucy did the exact same thing at this age. I know she will settle down, lets hope sooner rather than later! The terrible twos kicked in today as she had a mighty strop with Amy in Tesco whilst demanding that she was bought some new knickers. Just ask Anna, it would be much quieter and simpler and may bring you the result you want. That is definitely some food for thought for my youngest daughter...

We're all having a right royal time this weekend...

2011-05-01T19:03:00.008+01:00

What a fabulous weekend! A royal wedding on Friday which I thankfully managed to miss all of, but Amy and the girls had a cracking time with Auntie Kate, Granny and crew. They even got themselves on the telly celebrating in Wells. Anna and Lucy ably showing my contempt for the whole affair. Today we have eaten huge amounts of food relaxing in the sunshine with our neighbours and chilling out. Great burgers Libby! A spot of gardening yesterday, coffee outside the bistro, popped to see Grandma today and even managed to get the buddlier growing out of the chimney out with a little help from Ben. Lucy said I was bonkers as I attached pole after pole together and attempted to pull the irritating plant out. In the end my practical nature overcame the problem! The best part about this weekend has been those calm and intimate little moments with the girls that have been so memorable. Watering the plants with Anna this evening, taking Lucy swimming yesterday and the conversation we had about 'sat navs', watching Lucy play with her Dalmatians this morning and Anna turning Amy and I into a 'nugget' with her magic wand and the beaming smile that ensued every time she did it. They won't mean anything to anybody else. Just small moments between a father and his children that mean so much..

Our annual pilgrimage...

2011-04-23T20:33:00.007+01:00

The family Hammond made it's annual pilgrimage to the dinosaur park under considerable and sustained pressure from Anna who has been nagging us senseless to go for weeks now and as the weather was unbelievable yesterday we seized the opportunity. It is safe to say that Anna has the most eventful day of all of us. First, getting a 'croc' related blister that pretty much ensured she had a piggy back or ride on shoulders all the way round. Possibly a very shrewd move! Secondly, she managed to pee on a dinosaur's tail as she had an impromptu visit behind a hedge. Lastly, she could be seen about an hour later giving a T-Rex a really good slapping! Now how many people can say they managed to include all that into their day. I look forward to our visit next year, just for the simple reason to see what Anna comes up with and how she spends her day!

She's a chip off the old block!

2011-04-21T20:35:00.011+01:00

Anna is industrious, hard working and knows when a job needs doing in the house or the garden. Here she is helping her daddy with his household chores and workload by watering the plants. Good girl! Oh and by the way, it's the bank holiday weekend, the sun is shining, the forecast is brilliant and the paddling pool is out in the yard. Oh happy days indeed! I have found the last four days quite tough as I truly have not seen the girls at all this week since I went back to work and I am really excited about the prospect of another four days with my family. Sunshine, barbecue, chilling out and a bit of gardening. What more could I ask for?

Pregnancy and the evolution of christianity.....

2011-04-18T20:44:00.010+01:00

I went back to work today and have seen the girls for about twenty minutes and I am reminded of how good it was to spend time with them last week. The silly things they get up to that just keep the material for my blog and this record of family life just going and going.

Anna went through a day of diligently looking after 'Baby Jack' and attempted to empathise about what it was like to have a baby in your tummy. Guided by Lucy, they played a lovely game of mummies and schools. I was slightly worried because the whole thing was approached with such naivety and lack of real knowledge that it sounded like a teenage mother training camp and Anna's pretend pregnancy was rather hilarious.

Lucy, on the other hand has been dabbling in more profound issues in her life. She is extremely interested in Easter, Christianity and above all chocolate, and is very pleased that somebody decided to combine them all with the arrival of chocolate Easter eggs. She has, however, taken this a step further and I quote: 'Daddy; chocolate biscuits are very good for you and make you better when you are poorly. When Jesus was on the cross the good people gave him a chocolate biscuit and that made him better, which is why he came back to life on Easter Sunday.' It is a very interesting theological argument from the young lady on the left sporting her lovely new hair cut! Thanks for the lovely, yet slightly bizarre memories of last week girls - they kept me going on my first day back to work....

Mixed holiday feelings..

2011-04-14T13:11:00.020+01:00

The girls have enjoyed lots of things this week and I have loved being with them immensely. However, having now relaxed and slowed down, I find myself very tired and longing for some child free time just with Amy so I can remind her how much she is loved and that being my wife is special to me too. I also want to recharge my batteries. If I am honest, this week has been full of mixed feelings.

Anyway... Anna is delighted with her new safety hat for her bike, so much so that she has taken to wearing it inside. We have started a new family tradition this week and have set up the 'who can grow the tallest sunflower family competition'. I, of course will be the winner - perhaps with some secret chemical enhancement and I am contemplating sabotage that I will implement in the not too distant future (only kidding). The quality of the cake making in the house this week is exquisite and very tasty. This is not doing much for my waistline though. I have to say that I do not need any encouragement to eat sweet things and neither do the girls.

I feel a sense of sadness coming on, though, as I have to go back to work next week and will once again not see as much of my lovely family, but a bloke has got to earn a crust. Holidays and time off with my family are a double edged sword in the fact that I need a rest from the day-to-day grind and quality time with the ones I love just lifts my spirits. On the flip side, the fact that the girls are so busy and frankly quite exhausting, means that sometimes I also need a holiday from my children too! Amy and I work very hard and life can be a real struggle. Don't get me wrong, it is a struggle that I will always want in my life, as my girls are so special and make me feel amazing. Just sometimes you need a rest and time with your wife....

Spring time chilling and fun...

2011-04-11T16:24:00.006+01:00

I am on holiday, the sun is shining and we have had a fantastic three days so far of fun and chilling out in the spring sunshine. The normal pace of life we have as a family has slowed and slowed as the days have gone on and I feel the most relaxed I have felt in years.

We went for a picnic and bike ride in Sandringham on Sunday. Anna went bonkers on her bike as she weaved through the picnic tables filled with frightened pensioners at break-neck speed, completely fearless and with a beaming smile on her chocolate covered ice cream face - she nearly took out at least a dozen people. I was not sure whether to beam with pride or worry.

We have had coffee at the bistro (several times with marshmallows and cream!), ice cream in Wells today, hill rolling, lunch out at our favourite pub in Burnham, digging the garden with the girls and planting seeds, hunting for worms, tea and more tea with our neighbour Libby in the yard in the sun and I even chilled out enough to have a beer! Proper family life instead of the hustle and bustle of the working week. The only downside is the Hammond weather curse has struck and the cold and rain sets in tomorrow. All good things come to an end...

P.S Lucy beat me 6 - 1 at 'shut the box' this morning in ruthless fashion and with an audience. I have no dignity left!

The tooth fairy has arrived!

2011-04-05T19:47:00.005+01:00

The Hammond house is finally being graced by the presence of the Tooth Fairy after weeks and weeks of waiting as Lucy's wobbly tooth has finally fallen out while she crunched on a bit of toast at teatime at after school club. This tooth fairy business is going to cost me an arm and a leg. Lucy has just gone to bed armed with a pink envelope under her pillow in which she has placed a note asking for five pounds for her tooth. Nice try young lady! I have removed the tooth and placed a pound coin in the envelope and that's my final offer! No more negotiations on this matter, your father has spoken and had harsh words with the tooth fairy in regards to price freezing. Has anybody in my house not noticed that we are in the middle of one of the worst recessions that this country has seen?!?

The fearless and the poser...

2011-04-01T20:17:00.018+01:00

Anna is completely fearless, which she demonstrated this afternoon as she hurtled around the yard on her bike, fell off several times and just laughed it off and got back on. She does alarm me as she has not yet worked out how to use the brakes and will not let me show her. She's been a real chatterbox this week, it has been delightful that we can now have a conversation with her as her sentences develop as each day goes by. She loves spending time with me now and loves a bit of rough and tumble with her daddy. Face to face whilst she is giggling herself silly and smiling at me with her beautiful eyes is an amazing and memorable experience. She is a joy to watch as she meticulously looks after her toy baby, wrapping her in a blanket and talking to her. Then she spoils it all and sends the baby to the naughty corner for not doing what she is told!

Lucy is becoming a right poser for the camera this week and I have to say even though she is genetically connected to me (which could be a real problem), the camera is good to her and it turns out she is as beautifully photogenic as her mummy. Here she is, sporting her new school uniform ready for the summer. I was very worried this week as she told me during the rhyming game we were playing yesterday that 'Miss rhymes with piss, daddy!' Thankfully she had no idea what she was talking about..

Sorry I mentioned the sun..

2011-03-27T17:24:00.008+01:00

As soon as I mentioned the sunshine in my last post on Thursday I put the Hammond kiss of death on the weather and the temperature dropped about ten degrees: it started raining really heavily and the weekend's weather has been a complete wash out. My plans to take the girls out in the fresh air and do something this weekend were quickly stopped in their tracks. Never mind, we spent a cracking morning in Playland in the warm and had lots of fun and silliness. Anna was simply bonkers as she ran around creating havoc, she was without a doubt a woman on a mission. Having grown a couple of inches of late, she now has unlimited access to all the climbing frames, slides, guns and bouncing things and loved the freedom of this. There was a very funny moment as Anna rushed into the boys toilet at high speed and skidded on the puddle in the middle of the floor, slid all the way over the room and got up giggling. Not sure what the puddle was though! My baby girl is bonkers with attitude, hence the glasses. Parental mistake 47: Letting Lucy and Anna take out their toy babies today. I have been changing pretend nappies all day and strapping them in and out of car seats. Lesson learnt, I promise you. Never again!

A great welcome home...

2011-03-24T20:09:00.005Z

I went away for work this week and you would have thought that I would relish two nights away in a posh hotel and peace and quiet. No, I did not sleep a wink and the person in the room next to mine snored like an elephant. The best bit of the whole experience was coming home and the welcome and cuddles that the girls and Amy gave me. Lucy would not let me go for minutes and minutes and when Anna finally worked out she had missed me, she pestered me and pestered me for hugs, kisses, flips and tickles. It was lovely.

The sun is out this week, the temperature has risen and Lucy has a spring in her step. Her one liners have returned and she is in top form. For example: ' Mummy - this chilli is delicious but it is poisonous!' Her school work has been fabulous this week and I must be boring the living daylights out of any reader as I keep mentioning it, but she really is doing well and her enthusiasm for learning rises and rises. We are all getting tired now and there is only a few weeks till the Easter holidays and I have time off with my family as well. Can't wait! A bit of rest, family time and sunshine and I too may have a spring in my step! Who am I kidding, the girls will wear me out. Should be fun though...

And the winner is..

2011-03-18T19:50:00.004Z

Anna Hammond. Whose tireless effort and dedication earned her the amazing and grand prize of a 'comic relief tomato plant' as the undisputed winner of crazy hair day at nursery and boy did she carry it well! I only have a night before picture, the only explanation I can offer is that once the hair bands came out this morning it looked like a dodgy eighties perm. Well done Wiggle for putting up with something you really were not that happy about. Every penny you raised literally does save and change lives for those less fortunate than ourselves. We are indeed a fortunate family and blessed. While I type I have just been watching comic relief and a film about a girl called Esta who was about the same age as Lucy who was looking after her baby brother who was two after their mother had died. Tears are streaming down my face - I just can't help it. In another less lucky life that could be my girls. God bless crazy hair...

A family portrait..

2011-03-12T19:40:00.006Z

Lucy has completed her first ever picture of us all (including the cat!) and written all our names under each of us. Take a really close look, as Lucy seems to have dropped the name 'mummy' and decided to call her Amy instead! I think I am looking pretty good. I am, however, delighted at how far she has come on since she went to school. Not only is she good with the written word, she is quite handy and opinionated with the spoken word too. For example tonight when I lent over to give her a bedtime kiss she said 'please can I have a nice kiss, not a sloppy one daddy and if you do not try your hardest you will have to do it again!' She is so curious and the constant questions she asks are just her way of wanting to learn and learn. She always wants to find out about more things - this week it has been driving safety, getting points on your licence, free range 'happy' eggs and how do farmers kill the chickens we eat. I answered most of the questions by giving her all the information accept the killing chickens question and I may have added in a water park and cinema in for the happy chickens laying eggs! Anna's spoken word has been intermingled with a good old fashioned barking cough this week. Her best line being the mixing up of the words 'work surface' which is now known as 'sork wurface!' or my other personal favourite 'that stupid thing is really stupid daddy?!?'

Marbles, beads and buttons..

2011-03-05T19:52:00.007Z

I am afraid that I do not speak of these objects with any level of affection. In fact they are a source of much frustration and frequently induce muttered swear words from me. Wiggle loves collecting small things, so much to the point that nothing is safe in our house. It does not matter who it belongs to, she will swipe it and then add it to her ever expanding collection. She has several storage vessels and her mission is to transfer all this bits and pieces from box to lunchbox, lunchbox to jar, jar to tin and so on. She is very meticulous about what she should carry them around in on any given day. The problem with all this regular transferring is that it usually results in her dropping them all over the place and that in turn means I have to pick them up. The other problem is that one can be going about one's business and then suddenly tread on something such as a marble that makes you jump. This can be very hazardous when carrying coffee for example. If I tread on one more bead I think I may not be responsible for the language that comes out of my mouth. Her other trick is to fill her pockets with her swag and I always find out after I have put the washing machine on and then I have to listen to an hours clanking and clattering as a handful of marbles or beads get a thorough cleaning. As I type, the washing machine is making such nosies, I will find out what the cause is soon enough, I am sure. She is a hoarder of expert skill and despite my annoyance I can't help feeling it endears me to her more. She has a wheeler, dealer and geezer charm to her that shines through in the mischief she gets up to.

Snowdrops, mud and poo sticks!

2011-02-28T20:40:00.006Z

I spent a really nice Sunday morning with the girls and our neighbour Libby in the February sunshine walking in the Abbey grounds in Walsingham. In the spirit of the Sunday trend that the family Hammond needs more fresh air and sunshine we left Amy studiously planning the weeks teaching ahead and set out for a mild mannered adventure of sorts. I had not bargained on so much mud and the neurosis that it would bring me; concerned that the children would cover my new car in vast amounts of mud I was obsessed with trying to get their wellies clean whilst we walked. Never the less it was a bracing and enlightening walk. The girls learnt how to play poo sticks for the first time and Lucy tried her hand at using the camera. Lucy is mastering technology at such a scary speed. The other day she turned on the laptop, fired up the Internet and got into the BBC iplayer and went to her favourite CBeebies programme and then pressed play! I was speechless and still am. Anyway I digress, our morning finished up with meeting Amy in the bistro for coffee, marshmellows and cream and a very competitive game of 'Scaredy cat'. A game which I surprisingly enjoyed. I know I am a sad man, but I was determined that my two year old daughter not beat me...

A pivotal week...

2011-02-25T20:24:00.004Z

The Hammond girls have had a week of changes and pivotal things in their lives. Some changes they have responded to with grace and a smile, others they have instigated their right to protest strenuously! Anna began the week with a valiant attempt to go to bed without a nappy on, but sadly was not quite ready. We will try again in a few weeks. The girls both have new beds and are now sharing a room - lets just say there has been a mixed and emotional response to this so far. Lots of screaming, tears and stropping. Tonight they were much more settled and went to sleep quite quickly. Thank you. There is still quite a few things to sort out and we are converting Anna's old room into a playroom/study for us to use as well. No more toys and school clutter in my house everywhere - aah, a neurotic cleaning man's dream scenario! I am in heaven. I have to say, I put up quite a lot of resistance to the room change including my own version of a thirty something strop, but it does look delightful and they are very lucky girls indeed. I am concerned about them both having their own personal space, however it is pushing them very quickly into a fast track scheme to enable them to learn to share. That Mrs Hammond, she is quite a smooth operator you know. It definitely was not my idea...

School report..

2011-02-19T13:48:00.004Z

I can't think of a better way to celebrate my two hundred and fiftieth blog post in the story of my family than to tell Lucy how very proud I am of her and how hard she is working at school. Amy went to her parents evening at the infants school this week and Lucy received a glowing report from her teacher. Not only is she progressing well, she is impeccably behaved. She has already achieved the benchmark learning and progression that the national average achieves at the end of the first year. Well done indeed Looby chick! As a reward for all this hard work she has gone out for a girlie day clothes shopping and lunching with her mummy leaving me to fend for myself and look after the poor snot factory that is Anna. She and I both have a stinking cold and are quite simply knackered. Anna is asleep on the couch snoring like an elephant and I am enjoying some well earned peace and quiet after a very manic week at work during which I have shouldered the heavy burden of man flu...

The dangers of toothpaste and romance!

2011-02-13T16:18:00.004Z

Anna is very curious, very curious indeed and she will try almost anything to discover the way something works or what it can do. This curiosity can get her into trouble or put her in peril. This weeks antics included the eating of lots of toothpaste that she soon discovered does not make you feel very well! Lucy has never been very curious about objects, however she is very inquisitive and words and events. Today we were having a discussion about valentines day. I jokingly asked her whether she had a boyfriend at school and she bashfully replied 'no', going a nice colour of scarlet. Amy asked her whether she had a toyboy and she replied 'no, he's just short!' Who ever thought that romance could stunt your growth. You heard it here first, remember that!

Let the negotiations begin...

2011-02-08T18:49:00.003Z

The tooth fairy is about to arrive in my house as Lucy declared last night that she has her first wobbly tooth. Now this is new parental ground for both Amy and I and never in my wildest dreams did I realise that the tooth fairy was such a money grabbing capitalist. The debate raged last night as to what was the going for a tooth left under the pillow and after very poor negotiations on my part it appears that it is a pound a tooth. Lucy was armed and ready for this discussion, she even know what she is saving up for when she has lost enough teeth. Let's face it, I never stood a chance!

The end of my stint as a single parent..

2011-02-06T08:13:00.006Z

In the end I made it through my time alone with the girls without much fuss but sadly without much sleep. Anna hated the high wind at night this week and had me up several times. I am not sure that during my week off I have laid in bed beyond 6am, as the girls have both been very early risers. I fell very rested indeed, I am of course being very sarcastic. Despite this interrupted sleep Anna just keeps going and going and is, as ever, mad beyond belief. What normal person would leave the comfort of a lovely warm house in February completely naked just to collect a bay leaf from the yard for the cooking. If you do not believe me, please look right. This is not a doctored photo in that the time of year is different. The girls is bonkers and I simply adore her and her free spirit. The spaghetti did taste good and it was all down to the addition of that bay leaf, devotedly collected by a girl who wished to help her mummy...

So far so good...

2011-02-03T17:32:00.005Z

Amy has been away this week and I have been looking after the girls on my own for a few days. Now this is something that normally ends in disaster. I do not want to tempt fate but so far it is going swimmingly and I am disaster free. Now I have gone and said it and I am sure that all hell will break loose tonight! Actually, as I am typing the signs are there where both girls are extremely tired and short on willingness to comply. Who am I kidding, none of the Hammond family are ever compliant, it simply in our nature to be stubborn and awkward. I have really enjoyed this time with the girls on my own. We have not done anything fancy as they have been at school and nursery most of the day, but bath time, homework (managed to get Lucy to do some without nagging her), watching a movie with an ice cream and story time have been lovely and most of the time they have done as they are told. One slight note though girls, please understand that I do not have the ability to be in two places at once! I am a man......

Battling a clever and bright toddler..

2011-01-27T19:37:00.003Z

After last weekend's events when Anna did not like her daddy - she moved on from there and the battle of attrition began. She has skillfully moved up a 'toddler' gear and then that's when the screaming began and lots of it. She has been desperate all week to exert her independence and control on every situation. I have never been very good at dealing with the terrible twos and I find all the tantrums, drama and screaming very stressful. After a few very bad evenings and mornings I have managed to find a way past my angst and seem to be getting through to Anna and finding ways to deal with the inevitable behaviour and pushing of boundaries. In short, I have started to learn how to toughen up. She is still not sure about me at the moment as I have made it my mission to stop the toddler behaviour and try and teach her that there are positive ways to influence people and what goes on around you. I am not very good at this kind of stuff with our girls and wish I had the confidence that Amy always seems to have and calmly deals with situations. I can feel deskilled and sometimes lack the insight to be consistent. I was delighted though when I began to positively change the course of the week and Anna's behaviour. Who said parenting was ever going to be easy? These kind of situations always come along when you are at your most vulnerable and most tired. From the beautiful picture attached, any reader must be wondering what all the fuss is about......

It's been a long week and we are all grumpy!

2011-01-22T18:55:00.007Z

Everybody in the Hammond house is whacked out today after a long week at school and work. We have not seen much of each other this week and none of us have been up for spending time with one another, each of us definitely preferring our own company and chill out time. The girls have either been fighting, stropping or not doing as they are asked. Last week had finished with such promise as we all spent a magical afternoon on Sunday at Sandringham walking, eating ice cream, playing in the woods, we encountered a giant squirrel, I fell over and lost all my dignity and cut my arm, climbing trees and just being together in beautiful surroundings. I have to say it's all gone down hill a bit from there - we are very good at being grumpy as a family though! We are masters of it! Bright spot of the week: Lucy got to sit on the special bench at assembly at school as a treat for working so hard. Anna does simply not like her daddy this week, topped off by a moment today in Tesco when I would have loved the ground to have swallowed me up as she stropped and had a tantrum in the middle of the frozen isle. Ahh!!!!! Tomorrow is another day.

Learning the Lucy way..

2011-01-16T08:01:00.011Z

I continue to be very impressed with how well Lucy is learning since she started school and her enthusiasm to be involved in talking about new things and the world around her increases every day. Her interests seem to have evolved and she is attentively observing the people, animals and objects around her. Now this not mean much to a seasoned parent who has seen their children grow up, but to me it is amazing to watch her develop and grow. Her interests are now wide and varied beyond fairy princess pink things and television. She loves reading, writing, wildlife, playing, films, stories, drawing and she is even showing a practical ability in making things that I never thought I would see. I have feared for many years that she is going to be practically inept like her father! She even seems so much calmer since she started school. Maybe that is because she is tired and they have overwhelmed her into submission! Don't get me wrong Lucy has her moments and agitations, however the hard work that Amy and I are putting in seems to be paying off; her maturity is increasing and the person she is growing up to become is one that we can be very proud of indeed. I love to see character traits and skills such as generosity, kindness, respect and pride in what she does being nurtured and growing in her as a person..

Sun, sea, sand and a very cold wind!

2011-01-09T16:47:00.007Z

The weather was so nice today that we ventured outside! This has been a very rare excursion outside into the elements for the family Hammond due to the constant inclement weather of late, but today was breathtakingly beautiful on Wells beach. Simple pleasures such as gathering shells and pine cones, paddling, hide and seek, looking for the Gruffalo (we never found him), eating chocolate flapjack and warming our socks on Grandma's fire made for a very good morning indeed. We don't take enough advantage as a family of the amazing places that Norfolk has to offer and it is a new years resolution of mine to ensure that we do. I am not sure that Anna was particularly impressed as she was freezing in the cold January wind this morning! I just enjoyed the walking hand in hand with my wife and being with my family, it was bloody cold though!

Back to school...

2011-01-05T19:48:00.003Z

The three women in the Hammond house are back to work, nursery and school and are knackered already and the term has just begun! Anna marked her first day back by developing her enjoyment of the adventurous and forbidden by climbing out of a window in a Wendy house and falling on her nose. Lucy celebrated her first day back by being grumpy and hitting her daddy and Amy is just about to fall asleep on the couch already at 7.45pm! What are they going to be like in a couple of months time?!? I tell you, the women in my life simply have no stamina! Pace yourself ladies, there are many more long days to come and be nice to your daddy, even if you are tired, he is there to help!

Reflections on another family year..

2011-01-01T20:47:00.004Z

The year of 2010 brought many ups and downs for the family Hammond. My two girls are an amazing gift given to Amy and myself that are to be cherished for every life experience that they give us. I have to confess there are days that I could strangle them and other days its all I can do to breath when I look at them. They fill me with pride, frustration and love. Lucy has done so well at school in her first term and is emerging as generous, caring and loving big sister to her barmy younger sibling. Anna's character is off the scale in bubbling wackiness, chaos and an unstoppable love of life. That's a great word to describe her - unstoppable! My favourite memories of the year have to include the nativity play, Anna's naked bike riding and 'sandwiches', Lucy's one liners that get better and better, the pictures that they have both drawn for me, the endless trumping in my house and the giggles that ensue, first trip to the cinema with Lucy, Anna really started to talk this year and has not shut up since, her Hetty hoover and above all a vast amount of cuddles and kisses from my girls. Thank you girls - I look forward to doing battle with you in this new and amazing year, preferably with less snow and slightly less trumping! Happy new year!

I told you she was mad as a hatter!

2010-12-30T21:50:00.005Z

And here is the undisputed evidence. The camera does not lie in any way. The girl is totally barmy. Everybody that has come across Anna this Christmas has learnt more about her quirky character and mischievous nature and loved every minute with her...

Another Christmas rolls by...

2010-12-27T08:06:00.004Z

And what a cracker it was! Anna is still too small to embrace the whole concept yet, although she has clearly understood the concept of presents for her! Lucy's excitement levels reached fever pitch as she did not go to sleep till well after 11pm on Christmas eve, as she constantly peered over the top of her duvet at her stocking waiting for a glimpse of Santa who she hoped was going to fill it! Amy and I nearly got rumbled as we played Santa and we nearly broke the heart of our little girl. She is definitely not ready to find out that Santa does not exist. That girl is a true believer! We spent the whole of Christmas hanging out with family and friends, eating lots of delicious food that we did not have to cook and the girls received so many gifts there are simply too many to mention. I do now know what a Zhu-zhu pet is though and I am particularly impressed with Anna's attack hamster! All that was missing was a small missile unit that came out of the top to destroy it's enemy and the experience would have been complete! A big thank you to auntie Kate and Libby for their hospitality on the big day and feeding us so well. I enter the new year with the smug realisation that I have finally chosen a piece of jewelry that Amy likes, that is quite literally a first and am delighted that Anna did not start any more fires. Merry Christmas to all my girls..

Firestarter!

2010-12-23T20:09:00.005Z

Anna has the face of an angel and butter clearly would not melt in her mouth. However, appearances can be deceptive you know, very deceptive indeed! Anna has had quite a day, quite a day indeed. She started the day with a trip to the nurse as she has a well planned Christmas chest infection and a cough like an ill dinosaur. Despite feeling quite rough, it has not stopped her propensity for mischief or creating havoc. Her greatest feat of the day was to get the matches off the mantel piece and actually light one and the rug. I was not here but I think that Amy is still recovering! She is so inquisitive and takes note of anything you do and has clearly been watching me light the fire over the last few weeks. This is quite an accomplishment, bearing in mind the mantel piece is well over a metre high. They are now in the most inaccessible place in the house. Try and see you get them now young lady. NO more fires until you have gone to bed now either. Her other accomplishment is to hide the hair clip tub. Now, living in a house with three women, to whom the floor is their god and after they have used anything simply dump it on the floor. As the alpha male in the house you need to organise them without them knowing it and to do this you need tubs. So, for example whenever you find a hair clip simply dumped on the floor you pop it in the tub. So when they come to do their hair in the morning there is no moaning about the lack of hair clips, even though they are directly responsible for this. Usually works and reduces stress in the house. Or so I thought, my plan was not fool proof. For some reason I never bargained on loosing the tub! Oh well you win some and loose some. Anna, I will find it though....

Three more sleeps to go!

2010-12-22T19:24:00.004Z

The girls have rediscovered the ability to be nice to their daddy as the week has gone on and the Christmas fever pitch is now gathering momentum in the Hammond house. All the presents are now wrapped and under the tree (please note that I did not contribute as when I wrap something it tends to put the recipient off the present altogether!), Amy's surprise present has been purchased after months of scheming and saving (please, please, please like it!) and all that is left is to wait for Santa to fill up the stockings. Amy and I are very excited as we think the girls will love the gifts that we have got them. I feel emotional thinking about them opening their presents now so I won't tempt fate. Anna, having rediscovered her 'Wiggle' today, trumped whilst sitting on our neighbour Libby's lap today, we feel she was scenting her possessions. A statement that simply said - that's my Libby! Hope she doesn't take possession of me, Libby is welcome to keep that privileged position in Anna's life if that's the only benefit!

The season of good will to all man..

2010-12-19T18:42:00.007Z

Not in my bloody house it isn't! The younger section of the Hammond family have been foul today. Grumpy, unreasonable, belligerent, noisy, unsettled and fighting for most of the day. I think that the impact of such a long first term at school and nursery finally kicked in and Amy and I bore the brunt. Although there was a significant shift in excitement levels as the tree went up which signaled the beginning of the festivities. The only thing putting the damn thing up brought from me was much swearing and profanities! As my practical nature kicked in and the tree had the angle of the leaning tower of Piza; my patience dwindled and my temper grew. Anna won the prize for 'Hammond with the worst temperament' today by a country mile with my good self coming a close second...A delightful family Sunday. NOT!

He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!

2010-12-08T19:04:00.004Z

Today was the big day of Lucy's school play and boy were Amy and I excited. The play titled 'The Very Hopeless Camel' was a theatrical master piece and taking one of the lead roles as Mary was daughter number one and she did not disappoint in any way! Throughout the play she sang her heart out with vigour and enthusiasm, in a desperate attempt to impress; this is where it started to go slightly wrong as her singing evolved into shouting and she looked like a singing Wallace and Grommit character! One was definitely able to pick her voice out from all the other boys and girls! Then came her moment of fame as Lucy took to the stage in all her glory and proceeded to suck her thumb and pick her nose and eat it! This was probably the afternoons greatest moment of pride for both Amy and I. There were tears, but not necessarily of joy just profound giggling as she really delved into her left nostril and pulled out a real biggun! I was desperately worried as she nearly dropped the baby Jesus several times as she did the hand gestures to the songs and I really felt for the messiah, it would have been quite a fall from Lucy's lap! She did look very nervous at one point as she surveyed the crowd for Amy and myself at the beginning, once she saw us she clearly settled. Lucy and all the children did very well as the crowd must have been at least eighty peopIe strong and to little ones that must have been quite scary. Lucy, I only mock you because I love you dearly and I thought that it was one of the best things I have ever seen in my life. Thank you for the lovely parental memory. Amy and I also made the decision not to take Anna as we felt she may well simply be 'Anna', get up to mischief and potentially end up on the stage creating havoc as only she can..

Up to no good, the pair of them!

2010-12-05T14:55:00.006Z

Amy has been poorly for a few days and out of action, so I have been in charge! This is not a normal state of affairs so it has brought mixed results. Entertaining a five year old and a two year old is an interesting experience. The inclement weather has meant that the majority of activities needed to be indoors in the warm. My greatest successes include 'Toy Story 3' afternoon with hot chocolate and marshmellows and project Christmas tree picture. Well done Lucy yours was fantastic, Anna's was not quite so good as she relied heavily on me for creative direction and sadly I am not that creative. Sorry Wiggle! Less successful aspects of the last few days have been ensuring that both girls behave, they have at times been stubborn and difficult. Anna has taken to continuous screaming when she does not get her way and I seem to have lost my eyes in the back of my head skill that has enabled me to watch their every move. Turn your back and my girls quickly get up to mischief. Into the sink and mixing a potion of all sorts of bits and pieces from the kitchen. I only went to the toilet! Or Anna sticking lots of cornflakes to paper with Lip balm and then picking her nose and wiping it all over the paper! May be you just did not need your daddy's creativity Wiggle, it's a skill you already posses! When I found her she was happily singing away and humming a tune. She was very content indeed...

Let the festive consumption begin!

2010-12-01T18:20:00.005Z

We love food in the Hammond house in all sorts of forms. Whilst we do eat healthy things such as vegetables and fruit, I do have to say that we are a bit partial to the naughty things in life such as chocolate and home made cakes. So as much as it is my duty to teach my girls about the Christian festival that is Christmas it is as much my duty to ensure that they learn about the alternative side of this time of year and learn about such things as 'Chocolate Advent Calenders'. Please note that the Pepper Pig one is mine. Don't anybody ever accuse me of not educating my children!

The month of Movember!

2010-11-27T14:18:00.008Z

November (Or Movember as it is now known as I have been sporting some very dodgy charity facial hair) has been a month of varied experience, especially in the parental stakes. Firstly - it's snowing and lots! A little unexpected and less than fun. Although the girls would disagree. There is a delightful innocence in childhood that means they pay no attention to the practical things during snowy weather, like whether 'you can get the car out' or 'oh god I hope the boiler does not break down!' Both girls have been up to there old tricks this week with some great statements:

Anna - going through the motions in an imaginary conversation on the phone with Lucy's school teacher accidentally called her a bitch. I think the word she was looking for was beach. Her sentence forming is coming on, but she missed a few words out that made it hilarious!
Lucy had a rumbling tummy the other day (it was very noisy) - she looked at me and said 'Daddy I just don't know what to do with my rumbling tummy to make it stop. I have had a poo, some shreddies and I have even looked up at the ceiling and it still won't stop!'
Lucy - 'Daddy did you know that Father Christmas is on Facebook! Cool!'

Lovely moments with my girls. The downside of parenting is situations like last night when Anna was violently sick and I spent last night and today doing the washing that resulted from the several episodes of vomiting and what a distressing experience it was for her. She just did not understand what was happening OR the fear I felt yesterday when I drove in the snow for the first time with the girls in the car and suddenly I felt so responsible for their welfare. Good days and bad days - the joys of being a parent! I wouldn't, however miss it for the world, not single bit of it....

My house is a place of learning...

2010-11-20T20:27:00.004Z

The girls just keeping learning and it amazes me every day. Anna has a practical ability that can only come from Amy as it clearly does not come from me! She tackles a problem head on and just goes for it. However at times her ability is tempered by toddler stropping and a genetic ability not to allow people to help her or show her anything. 'I do it' is a regularly used phrase. Lucy simply loves learning at the moment - her letter recognition, reading and writing is going from strength to strength, as is her 'well done' sticker collection. She proudly came home the other day with a good manners certificate and got to sit on the special table at lunch at school. A kudos that is high in the life of a five year old I am told. I can feel a parental gibbering wreck moment coming on in the next few weeks, as Lucy has been chosen to be Mary in her school Christmas play, god I hope she doesn't have to sing! I am simply just going to cry and cry. Who cares she is my little girl. Amy and I did not believe her for several days, which is really bad I know. It's not that we felt she was lying, just maybe not leading lady material. Only time will tell. Lucy is one of those human beings who loves music and dancing with a real passion but is not necessarily blessed by an abundance of talent! Never the less we love you Looby Chick and we are so excited about your play....

Autumn days...

2010-11-13T20:33:00.003Z

The weather is turning and we are having to do more indoor activities with the girls as the winter is on the way and the endless tide of colds and coughs kicks in. So the odd escapade in the autumn leaves or in the park with the bikes will soon be like gold dust and a sheer joy. Wiggle did manage to come off her bike several times today and she fearlessly rode around at top speed! The girl is mad! Perhaps her best accomplishment of the day was when she decided that she needed to wash her socks today. Popped them the washing machine, turned it on, set the programme and fired it up. Anna - mental note, you need to put some washing liquid in otherwise not much cleaning goes on!

Home work girl!

2010-11-09T21:39:00.003Z

Lucy is working very hard indeed at school and home and her writing especially is progressing very well indeed. I am amazed by how quickly she is learning and the enthusiasm that she has. It is very difficult to keep pushing her to take part in the early evenings as she has had such a long day at school and club (before and after school) and I am finding that I do not have many skills in supporting her to learn and am finding it difficult. As a family we lead such busy lives and I have been taking the soft line that she is tired and I should just let her chill out. Amy on the other hand has worked so hard with her in recent weeks and really pushed her and I need to support with this so that she can continue with her progression. The results of Amy's hard work are clear to see as the other evening with help and guidance Lucy wrote the sentence 'We can take in puppets' on her whiteboard. WOW! I have learnt so much about myself as a parent as Lucy enters a new phase in her development and I really am a bit of a coward, as I need vigorous 'pushing' from my wife to take on new things I am not confident with when helping the girls. Well done Lucy and Amy - have a sticker each from a man who needs to learn a trick or two from his wife....

Deep filled with comic timing!

2010-11-05T18:28:00.005Z

Anna is developing a real sense of humour with very good timing this week. Whenever she is asked a question for some reason her only response is 'Sandwiches'! It all started in the car last weekend whilst we were playing eye spy and when the statement 'I spy with my little eye something beginning with R' Anna enthusiastically called out 'Sandwiches'! She delivers it with a glint in her eye and a very rye smile that makes it so much funnier than it sounds. Realising how funny we all thought it was she has milked the gag for all its worth and this has been the standard answer to everything. For example 'Anna - its time to go to bed'- she expertly looks around the room to see who is there for maximum affect, smirks and shouts 'Sandwiches'! I am not sure whether I am proud or slightly worried. You decide - what you would think if you were her father?!?

Did I feel guilty?

2010-10-30T18:34:00.003+01:00

Whenever Amy and I have anything for ourselves that does not involve the girls (which is rare) I am normally racked with guilt that we have not involved them. I am afraid that my parental morals went completely out of the window this week as I sat in a jacuzzi at Dunston Hall relaxing without the constant stream of the words 'Daddy can you....' OR sibling fighting that has emerged in recent weeks. Did I fell guilty? Not on this occasion. Not at all. Amy and I really needed that time together and deserved it. Being a parent is the hardest job in the world and I am very proud of the effort that Amy and I put in, however we need to remember to be us on the odd occasion, not just Mummy and Daddy. On collecting the girls we celebrated with an afternoon trip to play land in Wells and had a cracking family time. Can't wait for the next non parental time with my wife though, in the mean time back to the world of pink things, Night garden pyjamas and cranky little people...

You've got a friend in me...

2010-10-24T17:15:00.005+01:00

Wiggle has a very special friend and her name is Libby (our neighbour). Now Anna always takes a long time to work out whether she trusts adults other than us and it is testament to Libby that she adores her so much. Anna does not give up her personal space to others easily but whenever Libby is around Anna legs it towards Libby for a cuddle or to sit on her lap. The thumb goes in her mouth and she is content with her friend Libby. She loves going to Libby's house to play with the 'baby Jesus' and have homemade cakes and milk. Now the grown ups in the Hammond house are exploiting this love and special relationship by legging it on Thursday night for a night away and leaving Libby holding the baby, so to speak (plus the opinionated five year old). Ah bliss! Thank you Libby. On a different note I have had two very profound parental learning experiences today - the realisation that I love play land in Wells, in particular the ball firing guns and the farting elephant AND I now know what Jeggings are (a cross between Jeans and leggings). You learn so much every day being a parent!

High five!

2010-10-17T19:39:00.006+01:00

After the months and weeks of anticipation Lucy's big day and big party finally arrived and what a day she had. It has been an amazing day, but I am absolutely shattered! Amy and I were so nervous that she would not enjoy being the centre of attention as can often happen with Lucy, but she has been calm, gracious, smiling and has made me very proud, very proud indeed. Lucy is a lucky girl - she has received so many generous and fantastic gifts from all her friends and family, I am actually very worried about where we are going to put everything! The gifts were not just generous, but they were so insightful and related to everything that Lucy loves. Animals, her favourite films, pink sparkly things, High School Musial dolls, dressing up princess stuff, pens and bling. She really loves them all and will have hours and hours of fun. Thank you. Happy birthday Looby chick. We love you very much.

Keeping up with how much they grow up could be a full time job!

2010-10-11T20:55:00.005+01:00

I just cannot keep up with how much Lucy is changing. She is developing at a rate that I am finding hard to come to terms with. This weekend she will be five and it seems that day by day my little girl is becoming a grown up, then you are reminded at how vulnerable she is when she can't handle a new situation and how much she still depends upon us as her parents. During a conversation with her there are now times that I have to check back and remember what age she is as she is articulate and such a chatter box. It is a strange leveller when one actually gets to the bottom of her understanding when you are talking to her. She can talk the talk, but does not have the understanding to back it up yet. Speaking of birthdays, the excitement is definitely building in the Hammond house in regards to Sunday's party. Lucy was practicing in the back of the car over the weekend by singing 'Happy birthday to me, Happy birthday to me....' There is no doubt in my mind that she understands that she is the centre of attention this weekend and that many presents are coming her way!

DJ Wiggle is in da house!

2010-10-08T21:07:00.013+01:00

Anna is homing a new talent and that is mixing and sampling her pumping and wicked tunes on Lucy's pink Lazy town Walkman. If only those earphones truly did block out the noise that comes from the wretched thing! From now on she tells me that she wishes to be know not as Anna, but DJ Wiggle. She has been quite tired this week having combined nursery with all night partying, she has not left herself much time for sleeping! Although she has made time for stropping, giggling, milk and stories, lots of cuddles, a rash, much piddling, lots of use of the word 'no', hide and seek, puddle splashing, stealing a different pair of wellies from nursery each night and bringing them home, drawing lots of pictures (not always on the paper) and developed an obsession with the film 'Monsters Inc'. Not a bad week for one so young! Next week she has elaborate plans drafted out for more of the above and plenty of 'rudy toody!' Obsessed with stripping off my youngest daughter just simply runs around the house naked and giggling whilst mispronouncing the phrase. Now it would be a frightening prospect for all in my house if I considered doing that...

They are trashing my house bit by bit...

2010-10-02T17:28:00.005+01:00

My girls are trashing my house through general play and being poorly. They have inherited their mother's ability to walk in a room and leave a trail of destruction in their wake usually resulting in a stain on the carpet or the sofa. Lucy's 'piece de resistance' was to throw up violently upstairs this week on the carpet after drinking a pink drink and ruining the carpet. One way or another my eldest daughter is trying to make sure that everything in our house is her favourite colour. Just a basic thing such as having a drink this week results in disaster and my inevitable trudge to the kitchen to get a cloth and cleaning materials. God give me strength! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

The creative juices are flowing in the Hammond house!

2010-09-26T07:28:00.008+01:00

The girls have been drawing like their lives depend upon it this week. Lucy is loving school and is coming home drawing, reading and generally just wanting to learn. All this educational behaviour is clearly rubbing off onto her little sister, whose life mission is now to emulate her big sister. They will sit quietly and create an assembly line of imaginative creations, although Anna is not quite as skilled yet in explaining what she is drawing. You find yourself in that parental place that is a bit of a blur by simply saying 'That's nice Anna, very good!' - the reality being that you have no idea what you are looking at! Lucy treats Anna's pictures like the 'magic eye' ones in the eighties and spontaneously shouts out things like 'Well done Anna, it's a princess castle!' She obviously sees things that I don't!

Creative happenings are not just restricted to pictures, Lucy has developed a talent for elaborate story telling and her tale of 'Olivia the rainbow sheep' will go down in literary history forever as a classic. This week she came home from school having received a sticker for the best singing in the class, her teacher must be deaf, because in nearly five years of her life, this is not a talent I have heard any evidence of! Anna's powers of observation have expanded - she is now obsessed with my hairy arms and ran into the bathroom a couple of days ago whilst I was in the shower, pointed at my genitals and simply said 'What's that?'....

A tale of two girls...

2010-09-17T20:30:00.005+01:00

The girls have had contrasting weeks as they both begin new chapters within their lives. Anna - bless her, is having a wail of a time at nursery in her new 'big girls room', but is not fairing very well when she gets home and is quite simply exhausted and horrible. I could flower it up with understated language, but she has been awful this week. She is so tired and so wishes to impose herself on every situation, that high levels of frustration are kicking in and we have had many a strop. Phrase of the week is 'It's not fair!' complete with the most hilarious 'monk' face that Amy and I simply cannot take seriously (probably doesn't help the situation at all). Her energy levels just fade and turn into temper at the moment. Ah, the joys of the terrible twos. In contrast Lucy is coping very well with long days at school, is doing her reading homework with enthusiasm and without complaint every night, she is talking about her day and has even been helpful this week. Watch this space the bubble is bound to burst. She did declare to Amy today that there is one bit of school that she does not enjoy and that is 'listening to the teacher!' Apparently that is soooooooo boring......

Crazy Chick!

2010-09-12T18:06:00.005+01:00

Anna is one crazy chick! She is completely mad and at times uncontrollable. Despite this I have to say that this forms the basis of her charm and character and makes her so special. Mayhem is her speciality and she is very skilled. The path of destruction that she leaves when she plays with toys for example is equivalent to a level four hurricane and takes much longer to clear up! As much as she drives you mad, never listens to a word we say and does not sit still. You can't help but love this girl so much. Now that her speech is developing, her variety of insults and back chat has improved to a level that I can be nothing but proud of! She does wear me out though, coupled with a back problem I have at the moment, one is feeling a tad older this weekend and I have to say it is fifty percent Anna induced. Please slow down just a little bit for the sake of your old daddy, he's getting on a bit you know....