Damn, blast and piddle...

Still no more piddles on the toilet. I am becoming obsessed. I know Looby can do it! I know Looby can do it! A young lady of such science and methodology as Lucy must surely be able to master a quick pee on the toilet. I know it will come but I simply cannot wait. Pathetic I know, a grown man impatient about toilet training. Changing the subject, yesterday I talked about our new tactic of the naughty corner. Now when you are parents, it sometimes pans out that the only time you get to chat is when you are in bed, all is quiet and you reflect on the day. Amy said something very insightful and profound. If we could crack the answer I think we would be very rich. 'The principle of having a naughty corner is all very well, but what do you do if you are in Tesco's. We should invent the portable naughty corner!' ANSWERS ON A POST CARD TO EXTREMELY NAIVE PARENTS, FAKENHAM, NORFOLK. She truly does have a point - can you imagine banishing your child to the corner by the fish counter whilst you finish your shopping. Doesn't really work does it. Just imagine the opinionated looks you would get and the potential calls that would be made about you to social services. We have not yet come up with a way to counteract Lucy's belligerent streak outside of home yet. Watch this space......

All hail the naughty corner!

The adult Hammonds are fighting back. In true super nanny fashion we have created a naughty corner. Lucy has a very real habit of not doing what she is told - she can be belligerent and stubborn. Not at all like her parents! If questioned, I would deny it. My genetics have nothing to do with this. I am calm, never opinionated and very easy person to live with. Lucy has already paid two visits to the corner and she simply was not amused. It did work though. Amy and I talked and decided that this was what we were going to do to ensure that Lucy realises that she can not always do what she wants. Call us naive, but we have a plan and we are sticking to it. Wee wee update - Lucy has successfully used the toilet twice. However that stubborn streak has called a halt on proceedings. Lucy will not allow people to show her how to do things and again I can't think where she gets it from. Can't be me, I am always open and responsive to new ideas and instruction.

Lucy develops at such a fast rate, that sometimes I leap ahead in what I expect of her understanding. She still has so much to learn and experience and sometimes I can be too hard on her. We took the girls to see their great grand mother today who is very poorly in hospital. I got really angry with Lucy and she disrupted the visit. How can I possibly think she will understand adult concepts such as ill health and sadness. A toddlers world is so insular and we expect them to comply to ours and this really is a leap too far.

Anna, meanwhile is oblivious to all these social and family politics. She is now 10lbs 4ozs. Get in there girl. Damn those boobies are doing a good job! Boy can this girl poo too. I am really starting to feel that I am building a relationship with her. I have turned a corner in the last few days and feel more confident in the things I do with her. She smells simply scrumptious when you cuddle her. I do however prefer interactive and I can't wait till she starts to interact with us and becomes more animated.Thought it would be good describe Anna in F word style. Breasts, Milk, Burp, Cuddle, Settle, Kiss, Bed, Sleep, Wake, Cry, Sleep, Poo, Nappy, Change, Breasts, Milk, Burp, Cuddle, Settle, Kiss. DONE.

Daddy I've had a wee wee!

I sat Lucy on the toilet before her bath again today. I thought that it would be yet another fruitless attempt of constant praise and no reward. We have been at this for months and she has not used the toilet successfully yet. I walked away and Lucy said 'Daddy I have had a wee wee'. I am afraid that I braced myself for the usual disappointment, I picked Lucy up and much to my delight she had really passed urine on the toilet. Cue much joy, jumping, cuddles, praise and shouting 'yea'. You would have thought she had just won the Olympics. I was ecstatic! I know we have not cracked it, but it is a start and represents a result for months of effort and bribery. Do you know that could be a very good way to sum up parenting - effort and bribery. Anna as you can see was over the moon. Lucy celebrated with mass phone calls to family members and proudly told them about her triumph. I am so proud of her. I can't take credit for it though, Amy has put in all the hard graft. It's a shame that she could not have been the parent to find that she had finally cracked it. There will be many more potty triumphs for us to both enjoy, we haven't even got to wiping bottoms!

How can one so small make so much noise!

Anna can certainly make it known that she is unhappy. I am doomed, all these women in my life and the latest may have a real temper on her! Last night about 3am - she went purple and literally screamed the house down. I think I am going to have a very outspoken young lady on my hands. I am oddly enough pleased about this. I want my children to have spirit and to question things. I want them to fight for what they believe in. I have never been one for complying and I hope that my girls will continue this. Amy and I are both strong characters and I have a sneaking suspicion our girls will be too. Are you born with your personality or is this something that develops through your environment. I will find out in the coming years! Things aren't going so well at night and I find myself panicking that we are going to have another bad night when Anna is unsettled.On a brighter note Anna simply adores her bath - she is so chilled and relaxed and it is a pleasure to see her and Lucy sharing a bath and Lucy interacting and showing an interest in helping. All Lucy needs is a slightly more gentle touch. You can see by the lovely photo that Amy took on her phone that she is a proud big sister.

A bit pissed off. The weather has started to change and Amy took the girls to the Dinosaur park today and I missed out. We just did not have that opportunity during my time off and I'm gutted. I did enjoy Lucy telling me all about it in her own particular artful dodger toddler way though!

Me and my girls.....

I am gutted that I have to go back to work on Monday. I was really beginning to settle in life at home with my girls. All three of them! Just experiencing day-to-day family life has been delightful. I would be lying if I didn't say at times stressful! Having Amy, Lucy and Anna waiting at home when I get home from work on Monday will make it worth while. Don't get me wrong, I love my job, but in recent months I have begun to realise that some things and some people are simply more important. Today we went out for lunch followed by 'pick your own' raspberries. Just to sit back and watch the girls doing it was simply enough for me. I wanted to take a picture, but the camera battery was flat! We were given a lovely comment today when I was told that Lucy was a credit to Amy and I. Very pleased and very flattered. Quote of the day: 'I really love your shoes mummy, they are very nice!' by Lucy 'I am trying to incur my mother's favour' Hammond. She truly knows how to play the game!

Have just been having a row/discussion with my wife about the layout of my blog. I am perpetually frustrated about her need to make everything in our lives Farrow and ball 'new white' - translated posh magnolia and so a compromise has been reached and the layout has now been made multi-coloured. Hope you like it!

I wish the sun would shine!

Typical bloody British summer. It has been raining or really cold for most of this week. Today for example was simply miserable. Indoor activities have been the order of the day this week. It is really frustrating as my two weeks at home has nearly come to an end and I will have to go back to work. We have had good weather for just a couple of days out in nearly nineteen days that I have been off. Anna is so good during the day, so weather permitting we could have gone out and done some lovely things. I am deeply disappointed. Despite this, family life with two girls has been very tiring but amazing. Now I will have to come to terms with not being around quite so much. (Have not included the day Anna was born (which was beautiful) but we spent it in a stuffy hospital.) I do have to say we are knackered. Lucy is active and needs a lot of focus and stimulation and Anna is still awake at night. Lucy still remains the only person in our house who actually gets a decent nights sleep!

This week has seen a great improvement in Lucy and how she behaves around us. The hitting out has virtually stopped, but I am not going to talk it up. We have worked hard to ensure that she has had so much attention and included her with what we do with Anna. She simply loves Anna, at times she can be overenthusiastic! Anna continues to sleep, feed, fart (she has a delightful windy smile that comes from the corner of her mouth), scream and go really red when she gets angry, sleep more and then wake up when we don't want her to!

A lovely family day out. Simple as that!

The family Hammond has had a simple yet lovely day out. There is no other way of describing it. We took Lucy swimming and by the end she really was enjoying it. We have been very neglectful of teaching her to swim and she is not at all confident in the water, but today she came on leaps and bounds. I did have a heart in mouth moment as she slipped and went face down in the water, emerged with no tears and went and told her mummy she had been a brave girl. Please see photo attached - note the missing bikini bottoms, they were too big and had fallen down by this point. The rest of the day was spent hanging out with tourists in Sheringham - jewel of the Norfolk coast (or is that Cromer) - we ate fish and chips, giggled, relaxed in the sunshine, ate ice cream and sprinkles, threw stones into the sea, my wife breast fed Anna in front of an army of northern tourists (mainly elderly men who were transfixed! It must be a generational thing), played animal snap in the shade and just all spent quality time together. I can't wait until Anna gets bigger and can play an active part in the general silliness and family life. I am not sure that I can remember a more special day in a long time with my family. Simple. Days like this is what life is all about. Me and my girls..........