Monday 10 October 2022

Struggling to be the dad I want to be...

Things have been so very tough recently. I have really been struggling. A combination of work, the past and not addressing things that have got on top of me. This has left me in a space where I really do need to start doing something about this. I find myself not being the husband and the dad I want to be. The girls are growing up, facing huge challenges themselves and I have ended up in a place where I am not helping them or have no emotional space to be an effective parent. We came back from holiday and things reached a horrible head for me, where I broke down and my resilience went pop. Realising how I had been dealing with many things was not the right way to go about tackling my childhood and its impact, Auntie passing and not coming to terms with my grief and the impact that covid and my work has had on me. I had not been a good dad for some time. Insular and distanced. I took a breath, took stock and started to do something about this and am seeing a counsellor. It's really helping. I'm starting to find a better space to help my girls. Be there to guide them and make a parental bridge for them to use. The world is coming thick and fast at them and it's really tough. One day a time, I am starting to feel better. One day at a time, my wellbeing is improving and putting me in a better place to be a dad. So, here's to your new dad and working together to overcome what is ever thrown at us. Watch this space x